First Kisses

So... I was talking to my old roommate the other day, not even sure how I brought it up but I realized a kiss of mine that is in the top five was in a bar. I don't know if that is sad, pathetic, sick or what but it is something. Not that I go around ranking my kisses on a regular basis, but unless I am strange we all have those kisses we remember. And when I say remember I mean for better or worse I could rank my top five good as well as my top five bad. Does that make me a kissing whore? Maybe not five and five but still! So yea when one of my best kisses was in a bar, the Last Drop to make it worse, it makes me wonder lots.
I think I will start with my bad kisses because hey they are more fun.
This was hard because I have had a lot of bad kisses, i don't know if it is because men are forgetting how to kiss as they age or getting lazy but it is interesting.
No particular order with these:
~ I had one whose tongue hit my mouth LONG before his lips did. Which is not ok, because for a first kiss I do not want a tongue rammed down my throat ever (this is a reoccurring trend these days). So yea it got better because as he was trying to make out with my insides i bit his tongue to give me a hint and it did not work.
~Another horrible bad first kiss similar to the first, tongue issue but it was not so much ramming but like exploring my mouth with his tongue, I felt like he was cleaning my teeth with his tongue. That one actually kind of gave me the heebie jeebies lol.
~One of the worst was actually entertaining. It was a guy I knew who I had discussed my frustrations with about kissing as I do many people. His response was to kiss me, and give me one of the lamest kisses I have ever had in my whole life. It was like weak, I could barely tell he was kissing me. Ick it was pretty lame. The worst part of it was he seemed to think he was this great kisser, yea not so much.
~Another awkward moment in kissing is when a guy has asked to kiss me ahead of time. That is the worst, especially when you don't want them to kiss you. It kills the mood if there was one and is totally horrible for you if you don't want to kiss him lol.

Now onto good ones. I have thought about what makes a kiss good or bad to me. We know what makes them bad but good is a different story. Good tends to differ I guess on the situation and the person. Again where I begin to think I may be a kissing whore. There is this whole debate about first dates and to kiss or not to kiss. I think kissing on a first date is 110% fine if there is chemistry there. Granted i am not as good with the showing a guy how I feel these days but back in the day i was good at it! To me if I have had a great or good first date that first kiss lets me know if there is chemistry or not. Sparks so to speak. Along with the first kiss on a date I think they should not need to happen at the end of the date. I know this is the comfortable place and time to do it during the date but it is so cliche. I think especially if it is a lengthy first date kiss her when you feel it and think she does. (again with the kissing whore thing). So on that note some of my best first kisses:
~ I will start with the bar one ha. Middle of the week in the winter and we had gone there to play pool and just hang out because it would be dead. We were talking after playing pool and all the sudden mid sentence he leaned in and kissed me. Butterflies in the stomach kind of kiss but it was Out of no where, no asking lol. Once we had kissed he just smiled and said "sorry I just had to do that" It is sad that I still grin when i think of that one.
~ Another good one was actually an end of the date kiss. He had driven me back to my car and we were talking and saying goodbye. He then reached out and cupped my cheek and leaned in for the kiss. I don't know if it is just me but the cupping the cheek or face thing melts me, without fail.
~ The other good one is the surprise random one. This one was after a while hanging out with this guy, we were hanging at his house after spending ridiculous amounts of time together that weekend. We were sitting on the floor in front of his fish tank and the kiss just happened, it was expected yet not because it was not a date it was just hanging out, and it was good which is hard to find!
To me that first kiss should give butterflies or make you grin about it the next day. That to me is what makes a good first kiss, I have had other good ones but those stuck out. When you end the relationship and can still think fondly about the first kiss that is a good first kiss!!

Online Dating

So I have begun online dating and I have to say I do not believe those ads on TV. I have yet to find anyone here worth while. I did actually find on who was actually from the town I am in which in California is huge because well it is huge lol. He seemed to have potential had his masters, taught at the community college level, wanted his PhD. So I talked to him on the phone. I wanted to shoot myself the whole conversation. He is one of if not the most boring person I have ever met in my whole life. His "interesting" stories were so far from interesting it was sad. My other thing was he was 5'7 which is the height I pretend I am even though I am like 5'6 1/2ish. I was willing to overlook the height thing because finding an educated person has been hard here but I can't overlook it when he is the most boring person alive.
Other people I have talked to have made it clear they are just looking for sex which yea not interested. Others have taken themselves out of the running by asking rude and inappropriate questions, other than do you want to have sex lol.

So I have to say i am pretty sure I will be single the rest of my time here in CA well this particular town anyways. I don't have the energy to continue to sort through the bad to find one good. I have had a couple chances since I have been here, the one who I think would have had the best potential I blew because of my own stupidity so maybe now this is my punishment who knows.

Dreams

Dreams are very strange and I really think I need to look into what mine mean. I have been having some insane crazy ones these days and I wish I knew what they were all about.

Trip Home and New Years Resolution

So I am back in CA, feels like I never left which makes me a bit sad. I spent my time home, besides the being sick is was a lot of fun. I miss my family a lot and know for sure that when i am done with school I want to head back East. Christmas was good, got to see a lot of family. Went to see PS I Love You and it was so very good, makes me think I may never find love like that. New Years eve was very calm I was so sick blah. New Years Day Poker party was smaller than usual because of a big storm on the day :(. The day after new years I went down to Boston and had dinner with friends, it was fun but it was the beginning of my mouth problem. The drive home from Boston that day was horrific. Come to find out I need a root canal not thrilled about that at all.

I miss the puppy though she is sooooo freaking cute. As cute as she is I have to say it was a bit odd to not have my Abby there, I miss her lots and as much as my mom loves the puppy she misses her Abby too. If anyone wants to see pics I can show you my picasa album of them.

On a brighter note my Brother got his Eagle Scout the Sunday before I left. I am so proud of him, it is such a huge accomplishment and I have to say I got a bit teary eyed, my little dude is grown up and its scary and exciting.

On to my new years resolution took me 7 days to have my first regret. On the 7th I hung out with this kid I have been talking to and it was fun, made me more confused about the crush I had on him but what can you do. Why are guys so confusing and eh. I guess it doesnt much matter since he is in MA and I am in CA. So I guess my resolution will turn more into less regrets instead of none.

My last two days in MA were just hanging with my family. I was finally feeling better, had lunch with my cousin, and just chilled with my family.

Trip back to CA was uneventful which after the trip out to MA is a very good thing!!

I have my dentist appointment today, I wish I was not a 27 year old baby and afraid of the dentist but I should maybe get over that and I would not need a root canal!!!